How does God guide us?

Last week, I preached on God’s guidance of Paul and Silas in Acts 16, and in that same week, I ran an Alpha session on the same topic. So I thought I’d consolidate my thoughts in this article. This is a topic that lots of people ask me about.

Maps

There's one kind of thinking about guidance that goes something like this: God has a specific, ideal plan for every detail of your life. Your job is to find it. If you read the signs correctly and follow the right path, you will live the perfect life God has planned for you. But if you miss His signals, ignore the open and closed doors, then you will be stuck in a second-best life, less fruitful, less blessed, less than what could have been.

This idea of God’s hidden map for your life is appealing because it takes guidance seriously. But it carries a weight that can become crushing. It turns every decision into a high-stakes treasure hunt. It transforms every decision into a possible catastrophe. And it can cause us to freeze up waiting for a sign in the sky before we’ll act.

If we believe that God is sovereign, all-knowing, in control, and ruling over all things, and if we believe he has given us free will to make choices, how should we think about guidance?

Antinomy

First, we start by sitting comfortably with two things that are both true at once, even though they feel like they should cancel each other out. J.I. Packer, in Evangelism and the Sovereignty of God, calls this sovereignty/free-will paradox an "antinomy": not a contradiction to be resolved, but two truths that Scripture holds together without apology. God is completely sovereign over all things, including our choices and actions. And yet he holds each of us genuinely responsible for our decisions. Both are true. Packer is honest enough to say that to our finite minds, this is simply inexplicable. It’s like saying 1+1=3. Get used to it. Christian theology is full of antimonies. Be comforted by the fact that we don't need to resolve it before we can get moving. It's the mysterious reality of the universe God has made, and the life he calls us into.

The hidden map thinking tries to sidestep this antinomy by treating God's sovereignty as so total that our choices only matter as attempts to find a pre-written script. But that's not the full biblical picture. We are not a passive receiver of signals. We are human beings, made in God's image, capable of real choice and responsibility. And God, it turns out, is less interested in us decoding a map and more interested in us knowing Him. The mature disciple doesn’t constantly scan the horizon for hidden signs. They learn, day by day, to walk with Jesus.

Scripture

So how do we receive guidance from God? How do we hear His voice? Well, we should begin with the Bible, and we shouldn’t dismiss it as an unspiritual starting point for our approach. 

God has not hidden His will from us in a secret code. He has revealed it in the pages of the Bible, through commands, principles, stories, poetry, history, prophecy and wisdom. “All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness.” (2 Timothy 3:16) The Bible shows us what God requires of us. He shapes our conscience through Scripture. He forms our character over years of prayer, study and life together in the Christian community.

The theologian Garry Friesen described this Scripture-first approach as "the Way of Wisdom." His argument is straightforward. For guidance with moral questions, the Bible is fairly direct: love your neighbour, flee sexual immorality, honour your parents, tell the truth. But for what he calls "non-moral" decisions, the vast range of everyday choices that don't involve a clear biblical command, God grants us freedom. What career should I pursue? Where should I live? Who should I marry? What should I spend my money on? Where no biblical principle is violated, multiple options can all be equally pleasing to God. 

That's not a low view of God's involvement in your life. It's actually a high view of His Word. He has spoken. He has told you what matters. And in the things He hasn't specified, He trusts you, as someone being shaped by His Spirit and His Scriptures, to act wisely.

Now, a Scripture-first approach doesn’t have to mean a Scripture-only approach. The Bible itself shows us a God who speaks in far more ways than one: through creation, through dreams and visions, through the inner prompting of the Spirit, through the counsel of wise friends, through circumstance, through the community of believers, and through moments we can't fully explain but can't quite dismiss. A Scripture-only approach to guidance risks domesticating the Spirit, as if God finished speaking the moment the canon of Scripture closed. 

There are other ways God chooses to speak, and we do well to incorporate them in a healthy way into our approach to guidance. 

Feelings

Christians have received the Holy Spirit. And the Spirit communicates with our spirit (Romans 8:16, 1 Corinthians 2:10-13, Galatians 5:22-23). Therefore, at times we can experience a strong inner sense that God is leading us somewhere: as if He is saying a big “YES!”, or “No!”. Those experiences can be meaningful. But they need careful handling because our feelings can be muddled.

George Whitefield, one of the greatest preachers of the 18th century, once felt a powerful inner conviction that his newborn son would grow up to be a great preacher of the gospel. He named the child accordingly, certain this was divine leading. But his son died shortly after birth. Whitefield was understandably shaken and learned a painful lesson he carried throughout his ministry: even the most prayerful, Spirit-filled person can mistake their own hopes and desires for the voice of God. Subjective impressions, however sincere and however strong, aren't the same as divine command. And ignoring a feeling, however uncomfortable that might be, is not the same as sinning.

Speaking personally, when I was a young adult, I am so glad I was wrong about my feelings with regard to who I thought God wanted me to marry. At the time, however, those feelings were so powerful.

Having said that, God created us with feelings. And as we learned earlier this year in our sermons, Jesus had an emotional life as well. Emotions are important! We should not dismiss our feelings. So, if we get a big “Yes” or “No” in our gut, we should hold it lightly, don’t ignore it, test it against Scripture, and share our feelings with other wise Christians.

Dreams

Another way Christians throughout history have believed that the Holy Spirit can speak is through dreams. Today, in places where Christians are persecuted, such as Iran, there are many testimonies of muslim people being converted to Christianity because of a dream they had of Jesus.

The Bible contains many examples of God speaking through dreams, from Joseph and Daniel in the Old Testament to the dreams surrounding Jesus’ birth and the visions in Acts. At the same time, dreams are not presented as the normal or primary way God guides his people. The New Testament places far greater emphasis on Scripture, prayer, wisdom, the church community, and the Spirit shaping believers into the likeness of Christ. Not every dream is from God; many simply arise from our anxieties, desires, memories, or imagination, so discernment is essential. A helpful test is whether a dream draws you towards Christ, truth, repentance, love, and holiness, rather than fear, pride, or confusion. 

In my early twenties, I prayed for several months, asking God what he wanted me to do with my life. One night, I had a vivid dream that I was standing in the church at St Hilary's Kew, singing a worship song that I had written. At the time, the dream made no sense. I wasn’t attending St Hilary’s — I was attending St James Ivanhoe, studying music, and had no thought of working in the church — and I had certainly never written a worship song. Then, about five years later, I found myself working at St Hilary’s and one Sunday we sang a worship song I had just written. In that moment, I realised that years earlier God had given me a glimpse of the future, and only now did it make sense. This gave me a huge sense of assurance and encouragement.

My calling has not ultimately been to become a worship songwriter, but for the past twenty-six years I have worked in the church, including 13 years at St Hils, leading thousands of people to sing their hearts out to Jesus. Dreams can be difficult to interpret, and we should be cautious about building our lives around them, but sometimes they can carry a strange depth and significance that only becomes clear over time.

Prophecy

One of the gifts God has given to the church is the prophetic voice. Not prophecy in the sense of adding new doctrine to Scripture; the canon is closed, and the Bible remains the final word on everything that must be believed and obeyed. But prophecy in the sense Paul describes in 1 Corinthians 14: words of encouragement, insight, comfort and strengthening spoken into the life of the community and the lives of individuals within it. God still speaks this way. He speaks through people who are attentive to His Spirit, who have soaked themselves in Scripture, and who bring a word that lands with the weight of more than mere human insight.

Evangelicals and charismatics both believe in prophecy but use different language. An evangelical will point to a really gifted and wise Bible teacher who can apply God’s Word to our lives in a powerful and uplifting way, and treat their advice and insight as “prophetic” (without using the actual word). Whereas a charismatic will point to a really spiritually attuned, wise and mature Christian who can speak God’s truth into our lives in a powerful and uplifting way, and they will use the word “prophetic.” I suspect they are talking about the same concept.    

Most of us have experienced something like this. Someone says something to you, simply and without fanfare, and it reaches a place inside you that they couldn't have known about. It fits too precisely to be a coincidence. It arrives at exactly the right moment. It doesn't contradict Scripture; it echoes it, applies it, brings it home with a personal specificity that feels like a hand on the shoulder from God Himself. That is the prophetic gift at work, and it is a genuine mercy. We should expect it, welcome it, and give thanks for it.

Once, back in about 2010, I was at a Soul Survivor conference at Belgrave Heights Convention Centre. I was playing in the worship band. After the main worship and teaching session finished, I was sitting alone in the auditorium chairs. One of the Canberra Soul Survivor leaders came up to me. We did not know each other. He said to me, “I have something on my heart that I think God is telling me to tell you, two words: “songwriting” and “refugees.” It felt like a bolt of lightning went through my body. At that time, I was working on recording my first album with my band, writing songs that adapted old hymn lyrics to new music. And Jo was working with refugees, managing the Ecumenical Migration Centre at the Brotherhood of St Laurence. That small act of prophetic insight spoken to me felt like God saying, “I see you and Jo, and I love you both.” It felt like a warm, encouraging hug from God. This wasn’t a prophetic word that guided me to a new place, but it did encourage me to keep doing what I was doing. 

But the same cautions apply here as everywhere else in this conversation. Prophecy in this mode is not infallible, and the New Testament is clear that it must be weighed and tested. Paul tells the Thessalonians not to despise prophecy, but in the very next breath, he tells them to test everything (1 Thessalonians 5:20–21). A word offered prophetically is an invitation to discern, not a command to obey. Bring it to Scripture. Sit with it in prayer. Talk it over with someone you trust. If it is from God, it will bear weight under scrutiny; it won't wilt when examined. And be wary of any prophetic culture that discourages questions, demands immediate response, or places the word of a particular individual beyond testing. That is not the Spirit's way. The Spirit's way is light, not pressure.

Coincidences

Most Christians who have walked with God for any length of time have strange and mysterious stories that are important to them. The phone call that came at exactly the right moment. The verse that leapt off the page the morning of a hard conversation. The unexpected encounter with someone you'd been meaning to contact. The door that closed so firmly it felt like more than bad luck, or the one that swung open so cleanly it seemed arranged.

Are these things God? Are they coincidences? Are they just pattern-seeking brains doing what brains do? The honest answer is: we can't always know. And that's okay.

A mature faith doesn't demand certainty in every direction. It's possible to hold these moments with openness rather than either dismissing them entirely or treating every minor coincidence as a personalised email from heaven. The sovereign God who holds all things does work through circumstances. Providence is real. He is not absent from the texture of your daily life.

But a few cautions are worth considering. First, a striking coincidence confirms; it rarely initiates. If a circumstance seems to echo something you're already sensing through Scripture and prayer, that convergence is worth paying attention to. If a coincidence is the only thing pointing you in a direction, be more careful. Second, we see patterns we want to see. That's not cynicism, it's just human psychology. The person desperate for a relationship will read more into a chance meeting than someone in a different season of life. Desire shapes perception. So bring those moments to God in prayer, sit with them, talk about them with someone you trust, and resist the urge to reach a conclusion too quickly.

God is present in the ordinary. He doesn't need spectacular signs to guide His people. But He is also free to work however He chooses. Hold these moments with open hands, neither grasping nor dismissing.

In our secular age, when we are discipled by the world to have a “closed take”, that is, to be “closed” to the spiritual, to see reality as unspiritual, with no God and no spiritual realm, we do well to try and have an “open take”. That is, to be “open” to God’s work in the world, to be “open” to the spiritual, including in the everyday ordinariness of life. Perhaps a coincidence is not a coincidence but a sign? (For more on this, see my earlier blog post on having an open take.)

Christians

One of the most underused resources in guidance is also one of the most obvious: other Christians. Not the internet. Not an anonymous forum. Not the loudest voice in the room. Not ChatGPT. Actual people who know you, know the Scriptures, and have walked with God long enough to have some hard-won wisdom to offer.

This is one of the reasons God gave us the local church. We are not meant to navigate life alone, consulting only our own impressions and instincts. We are a body, and in a body, the parts need each other. Proverbs is emphatic about this: plans fail without counsel, and wisdom is found in a multitude of advisers. The image isn't a crowd shouting opinions. It's trusted voices, speaking honestly.

It should be said, however, that not every Christian is a wise counsellor, and the difference really matters.

Wisdom is not the same as confidence. Some people give advice with great certainty, even though they have very little actual wisdom to back it up. Spiritual-sounding language isn't the same as spiritual depth. "I feel like God is saying..." can come from someone with genuine discernment, or from someone projecting their own preferences onto you with a theological wrapper. Learn to tell the difference.

A wise counsellor is someone whose life you respect. Someone who has faced difficulty and come through it with their faith and character intact. Someone who listens before they speak, who asks good questions, who is honest enough to tell you things you might not want to hear. Someone who points you back to Scripture rather than just to their own experience. Someone who holds your situation with care rather than rushing to tidy it up. Someone who builds up your faith, rather than dismantles it.

I have several wise Christians in my life with whom I have ongoing conversations about my life and ministry (my wife, my parents, my coach, my close ministry friends, my mentors). I find, more often than not, that they sing from the same hymn sheet: in other words, they will tend to encourage me in the same direction or raise similar questions. If there's a lot of disagreement, that can be a sign that I haven't yet got clarity from God.   

Wise people are worth their weight in gold. If you have two or three such people in your life, you are rich. Make it your number one priority. Cultivate those relationships before you need them. And when you face a significant decision, bring it to them. 

Freedom

God has not set a trap for you. He hasn't buried His will in a series of cryptic signs that only the spiritually sharp can decode. He hasn't arranged your life so that one wrong turn sends you into second-rate territory forever. He is sovereign over all of it. The open doors and the closed ones. The decisions you made wisely and the ones you'd take back. The paths you chose and the ones you didn't. His purposes are not fragile. He is not undone by your uncertainty.

The Way of Wisdom cuts through the anxiety. It says, "God has given you His Word." Read it, know it, love it. Pray with honesty and expectation. Pay attention to the texture of your life, and hold the unexpected moments with open hands. Have an “open take” to the spiritual realm. Write down your dreams. Seek counsel from people who know both you and the Scriptures well. And then, in the freedom He has granted you, act. Make the decision. Take the step. Trust that the God who holds all things is perfectly capable of working through your wisdom, your mistakes and everything in between.